


Hit or Miss

by ohnoscarlett



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Unrelated Winchesters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-06-29
Updated: 2006-07-20
Packaged: 2018-11-01 15:08:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10924386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohnoscarlett/pseuds/ohnoscarlett
Summary: Disclaimers, etc.Dean and Sam are not related.  And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

>   _Disclaimers, etc._   Dean and Sam are not related.  And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)

Title:Hit or Miss, Sections 1-3/?

Universe:Supernatural

Genre:het

Rating:Sections 1-3 PG, essentially, but I tend to curse a bit.  Later on, all bets are off.  
Notes:   _Disclaimers, etc._   Dean and Sam are not related.And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)

 

 

  


.1.

Dean met Sam when they were four.When Dean heard the girl’s name, he blanched and clamped his lips together.No, he definitely wasn’t talking.She was Pastor Jim’s daughter, and she had a dead mother too.John and Jim were friends, so it was natural for them to go there after Mary’s death.And the baby’s.Baby Sam.

 

Sam took one look at Dean and fell in love.The poor baby had just lost his Mama, and he was all sad and quiet and needed someone to take care of him.His Daddy just didn’t cut it.Sam would save him.

 

Dean and Sam were inseparable.Dean was still frozen in shocked silence, so Sam spoke for him, dragged him around, kept him going.And surprisingly enough, to John, Dean let her.Dean was independent and talkative and energetic.In a word:a handful.He _was_.Now he was a shadow of the little boy he had been.But Sam had been there too.And she had survived.It couldn’t hurt to let her work her little girl magic on his boy.

 

Dean and Sam went to kindergarten together.When their teacher suggested splitting them up, they clung to each other fiercely.Dean burst into silent tears, and Sam turned on a withering look.It was not suggested again.

 

John and Dean stayed with Jim for nearly a year and a half.It gave John a chance to collect himself.Identify a goal.Gain some skill.It gave Dean a chance to recover.He still wasn’t talking, but he didn’t carry a haunted look any longer.And he had Sam.

 

John decided to move on when the school year finished.Little Sam was heartbroken.No amount of promises of phone calls and visits would soothe her.Dean was simply silent.They sat on the porch steps and he clutched his friend tightly while John packed the car.Sam sobbed against Dean’s shoulder, her little arms wrapped around his neck.John would have sworn he could hear Dean talking to her.

 

As they drove away, Dean peered out the window.He watched as the little girl and her father, their friends, grew smaller and smaller.When Sam finally shrank into nothingness, Dean’s sweaty little hand slid down the car window and fell onto the seat with a thud.He breathed out with a sigh.

 

“ _Sam_.”

 

.2.

Dean spent summers with Jim and Sam until he was old enough to join John on hunts.Every summer started with raucous cries of joy, mad scrambling, and general mayhem until one or the other took a thump to the head with a stern admonishment to “ _shut it down_ …”Sam always dragged Dean up to her room to give an annual report, show and tell, squeal and giggle until they tired themselves out.No matter that Dean already knew most of her news.It was fresh again with drawings and photographs and bits of girly detritus.Dean was mystified.Captivated.Dean was _home_.

 

Dean and Sam were twelve the last summer they spent together.Dean hadn’t gone on any hunts with John, but they all knew it was coming.John had trained him all year, and now Jim did too.Dean was stronger, faster, smarter.Ready.He was all wiry and long-limbed, like a colt.He was brimming with energy and anxious to join the game.Sam, however, was not.It had become apparent that Sam’s training was to be for defense only.Jim would not allow her to hunt.It was too dangerous.

 

Jim and John made an excellent team to train Dean and Sam.Jim became a pastor after his wife’s death.He used this focus as part of his defense, and Sam’s.There were other methods as well, proven by the arsenal in the church basement.This made Jim a good opposition to John.John’s focus was obviously offense.Dean would soon be going with John as a participant.Dean _needed_ the training.Sam wasn’t going anywhere, so why bother?Dean and Sam did not agree on this point.Even if she _was_ a match for Dean, for the most part, and their sparring was fierce.Everything was touched with a huge competitive edge.

 

Dean was growing easily into his position as a hunter. Sam was having a bit more trouble.Things weren’t the same.Dean and Sam had always had an easy friendship.It had been Sam, after all, who drew Dean out of his shell of grief that first year.They had _bonded_.Every year they picked up as if no time had been spent apart.But _this year_ … this year was different.Sam knew it had to be because they were growing up.Hell, she could practically smell the hormones floating on the wind.And they fought.Dean had become, at turns, a surly little bastard or the same sweet kid she had always known.It was very confusing.But then, the same could be said for Sam.Dean didn’t know from one minute to the next whether he was going to be cuddled by his little mother or slapped by the bitch.

 

Dean and Sam fought like cats and dogs.Over everything.Dean was acquiring a very smart mouth, and Sam frequently wanted to slap the smug look off his face.So she did.

John and Jim were often forced to pull them apart and start arguments of their own.

 

“Dean, you don’t hit girls.”

 

“But _Dad_!She punched me in the face!”

 

“Samantha, I don’t care what he said—“

 

“But _Dad_!He called me a  <pick one>!”

 

“You need to learn when to be gentle.”

 

“You need to learn to let things go.”

 

“You need to watch your mouth.”

 

“You need to remember who your friends are.”

 

Such encounters inevitably led to Sam fleeing to her room in tears, and a thoroughly confused Dean pouting in the Impala, or on the porch, or in the barn.He wasn’t picky.

 

Dean had always considered Sam his best friend.She knew him the best, at least.But he didn’t understand her.Not anymore.Sam had always been one of the guys.She could play games, and run, and even shoot (better than he could, he had to admit.)He needed to talk to his dad…

 

“Sam turned into a girl!”

 

“She’s always been a girl, son.”

 

“Then what’s her problem?”

 

“Well…”

 

Dean hadn’t liked that he had needed to have the facts of life re-told to him by his father.They learned that in school.It was just… different actually seeing it.Weird.And he missed his friend the way she was.Before all this girly business.None of their problems could be _his_ fault, of course!But maybe Dean could salvage the situation.He couldn’t _handle_ tears. _Freaking girls_.

 

Dean found Sam in her room.That’s where she always went.The door was closed, so after a minute of silent debate, he knocked.

 

“Fuck off!”Dean snorted.

 

“I bet your father wouldn’t like to hear that,” he replied.

 

“I knew it was _you_ , Dean.”Dean smiled.At least his friend still knew _him_ , even if he had _no idea_ what was going on.Dean always found Sam after a blow-out, to smooth things over.Tears.It was the tears.And he had a sneaking suspicion that she knew it.

 

.3.

Dean was sixteen when he and John stayed in Minnesota again for longer than a few days.He was old enough now to hunt with John full time during the summer.He had the energy, and the stamina, for the long drives and the flurry of activity of fierce hunt after fierce hunt, week after week after week.The school year was almost restful.They tried to stay in one place for most of the year, using it as a base for John’s forays, and of course, for Dean’s schooling.But the hunts got further and further away each spring, and they would have to move to a different center of activity.This time just took them back to Minnesota.Back to Jim and Sam.

 

Sam had nearly broken Dean’s eardrum with the squealing when he had called to tell her they were coming.Strange girl.Only Sam would get excited about them coming to stay.Not that Dean couldn’t get the girls excited.That made him grin.Girls loved him.Dean could get a girl to do his homework and make her think it was her idea.Dean could get a girl to come over to study and end up making out on the couch.Dean could get a girl to… well, pretty much anything he wanted.The bases, they had been rounded.

 

Sam was waiting on the porch when the Impala pulled up.Dean was her best friend and she hadn’t seen him in nearly a year.They talked, sure, but Dean mostly called if they were going somewhere interesting, or he had killed something cool.Not much of a talker, that boy.Sam caught her breath and bit her lip hard when Dean got out of the car. _Holy fuck_.Dean had… grown.He was tall now.Taller than her, finally, and all legs.She could see his easy smile as he straightened and turned toward the house.His eyes lit up and his smile widened when he saw her. _Oh hot damn_ …How was she supposed to be friends with _that_?

 

Dean had to make a conscious effort to turn off the part of him that thought all girls were there for his benefit.But that smile was already automatic…First of all, Sam was his _friend_.His oldest friend.And secondly, Pastor Jim would kill him if he even thought about it.

 

Dean didn’t have time to think about it.Sam launched off the porch and threw herself at Dean with a speed he had rarely seen aside from monsters and demons.He picked her up with a laugh and spun her around, her feet kicking wildly.Sam hugged him so hard he grunted, and it was her turn to laugh.They had met again.And they were still friends.They were safe.

 

Dean and Sam were inseparable.The local girls, not necessarily Sam’s _friends_ , but local, couldn’t understand it.Some of them remembered him from kindergarten.No one moved away, for goodness sake, so of course they remembered him.Dean was the hottest thing to show up in northern Minnesota in, well, _ever_ , and didn’t he just know it.So what was he doing hanging around that freak Murphy girl?It gave Sam a perverse pleasure to know the girls were all a-twitter over Dean.Dean was _hers_.But then, not.They were firmly entrenched as friends, and there they would stay.It was good that way.

 

That year in Minnesota, Dean saw the least action ever.It wasn’t that the girls weren’t willing.Oh no, there were any number of willing girls he could have picked up.He just couldn’t do it in front of Sam.Not that he would have made a move on another girl _in front of_ Sam, but—behind her back?She would have killed him.Sam still had the edge on him in some things.But those girls had nothing better to do than talk, talk, talk about people, and it would certainly have gotten around to Sam if he had done anything.But then, Dean didn’t really ever have the time to hook up with random girls.He and Sam were _always_ together.And it wasn’t a bad thing.Girl was a trip.

 

Dean always tried to be the best for his father. _The demon hunter_.Dean learned his Latin and Hebrew.He trained until he barely had energy to stand but could still fire a perfect shot and reload in no time.He did have something of a smart mouth, but never to John.Never, ever to John.Sam, on the other hand…The Pastor’s daughter.Sam had a potty mouth and felt no need to restrain it.Except with Jim.Everyone else was fair game.So she learned her Latin and Hebrew, including all the dirty words.She trained at Dean’s side and took the low shots.Self-defense wasn’t meant to be pretty, after all.Sam just tried to make it more entertaining.

 

Dean had turned out pretty.It just kept popping up in Sam’s head.He was her best friend in the world, but _damn_.A good long Minnesota winter playing football hadn’t hurt him one bit.He was solid as a rock.A _big_ rock.Sam was sure she could bounce quarters off his abs.Not that she ever _looked_ …And he was fast!Who knew football would be such good practice for hunting?A lot more targets and obstacles than just Dean against Sam, that was for sure.And a lot more time for both of them spent with other people, which was good too.Sam needed to look up from her book and see someone who wasn’t Dean, on occasion.

 

Football season was well over by the time spring came again.Sam thought it was all well and good, because Dean had been getting full of himself due to a successful season and all the community praise and girlish attention it won him.Dean needed some alone time.So now they ran.It didn’t really amount to alone time for Dean, but it was just Sam, not a whole throng of people, and that was good too.Sam was always good company.And they ran together well.Sam was now a good six inches shorter than Dean, but she had a good long stride.Dean didn’t have to mince his steps or slow down much at all.They kept a good pace.It gave them a chance to catch up on daily happenings, quiz each other on school work or something hunt-related.It gave Dean a chance to watch Sam’s legs in little shorts.Dean was a leg man.And neither of them ever wore shorts otherwise.Just to run.And Sam had nice legs.It was a shame, really.Legs like that should be out more often.Not that he was looking.

 

The school year finished.Jim let Sam and Dean drive around the property in a raggedy-ass shit-pile of a jeep, older than the both of them put together.It wasn’t the sleek black Impala, but it was something.They quickly learned how to get unstuck from mud.How deep you could drive in water before the engine quit.How to fix said waterlogged engine.Jim let them take it into town when they both had passed their drivers tests.

 

“Hey, Winchester!”Dean looked up.He and Sam were lounging in the jeep in town, trying to decide what to do with themselves while not using too much effort.It was hot, and he was not in the mood for bullshit from the idiot yahoo calling him, football teammate or no.

 

“What?”Dean stood up through the open roof and slumped, arms crossed, atop the bar in front of him.He effectively blocked Andy Olasson from Sam’s view.It also brought him up taller.Freaking kid was gigantic.Sam couldn’t hear what they were saying to each other, either, and it was making her crazy.Suddenly, Dean’s fist flew out and struck Oly square in the jaw.The jeep was started and they were gone before he even hit the ground.

 

Dean drove them far back into Jim’s property.He didn’t need to.It’s not like that punk Oly was going to follow them anywhere.But once they had crossed the stream, Dean must have felt safe because he stopped the jeep.

 

“What was that all about?” snapped Sam.

 

“Nothing.”

 

“Riiight.So, really?” she pushed.

 

“Don’t worry about it.”

 

“Come on!Tell me!” Sam insisted.

 

“You don’t want to know.”

 

“I don’t?How do you know what I want?”Dean had been staring out straight over the steering wheel.At this, he turned his head and looked at Sam.His eyes were bright and there were tiny spots of pink high on his cheeks.Sam was beginning to doubt her questioning strategy.

 

“I know.I know you.” _I just bet you do_ , thought Sam, right before Dean leaned over and kissed her.

 

John and Dean left the next day, several weeks earlier than planned.Olasson’s broken jaw notwithstanding.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   _Disclaimers, etc._   Dean and Sam are not related.  And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)  Since I'm a giant chicken, right here in my journal is the only place this section will be posted.

Title:Hit or Miss, Section 4/? (this part is really long, so it's in multiple posts, sorry)

Universe:Supernatural

Genre:het

Rating:  NC-17.  Section 4 is pretty much porn.  Later on, all bets are off.

Notes: _Disclaimers, etc._ Dean and Sam are not related.And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)  Since I'm a giant chicken, right here in my journal is the only place this section will be posted.

 

  


  


.4.

  


Dean was twenty when he got a frantic phone call from Sam.She was at the university in Minneapolis. _“Please, Dean, I need you”_ was all it took.He was in Arizona.It took him sixteen hours.Sixteen hours to replay the call over and over in his head.

  


_Where are you?_

  


_School._

  


_I’ll be there. <click>_

  


Dean met Sam outside her dorm and she climbed into the Impala without a word.Dean drove north away from campus, away from the river, and didn’t stop until urban had decayed into suburban into rural.And it was dark again.

  


Dean had driven past Duluth, and around to the north shore of Lake Superior.It was October, and cold.He stopped before they could see the lake, but they could smell it, distinctive, almost like the ocean.Dean wasn’t one to push, so they sat in silence in the car.

  


“There are a lot of ghosts up here,” Sam said.Dean smiled.Start off on common ground; that was the easiest way to do it.“Superior doesn’t give up the dead.Neither do I, apparently.”Dean snapped his head around.

  


“What’s wrong, Sam?”

  


“Kris broke up with me.”Dean had to bite his lip to keep either of his two reactions from coming out.The first being “ _fucker”_.The other being slightly less charitable to everyone involved, including himself for driving sixteen hours to hear something that could have just as easily been said over the phone.Damn girl.

  


“So you want me to kick his ass?”

  


“No.I want you to know why.”Dean’s bones chilled. _This can’t be good_.“It was you.”

  


“ _What?_ ”

  


“He had a problem with us being friends…”

  


“Well, if that’s all, fuck him—“

  


“I wouldn’t.”

  


“ _What?_ ”

  


“I wouldn’t have sex with him.”

  


“Why do you feel the need to tell me this?Seriously.This is way more girlie than I can usually handle, even from you.And I’ve taken a lot of girlie bullshit from you.”

  


“I wouldn’t have sex with him...”

  


“We’ve established that.”

  


“Because it wasn’t you.” _Whoa_.Sam got out of the car, slamming the door like she always did because it was heavy and required some effort to move.Dean winced. _Oh shit_.

  


Pine needles crunched under his boots as he followed Sam.They had grown up together, for goodness sake.They kicked the crap out of each other on a regular schedule.They were practically brother and sister. _No, they weren’t_.Dean never thought of Sam as his sister.He would never have been able to leave year after year.He would never have kissed her at seventeen, after that stupid fuck suggested that they already were going at it hot and heavy and wouldn’t Dean like to share some of that with a teammate.They obviously didn’t seem like brother and sister to other people.

  


Sam stopped walking and leaned up against a tree.She shouldn’t have let it get this far.Dean was her friend, for fuck’s sake.Sure, he had messed with her head a bit that last year they were here, but it was nothing she shouldn’t have gotten over.They had been _seventeen_.Things happen.It was one kiss.Just one.But she remembered the look on his face right before he leaned in.And the softness of his lips on hers, even when he grasped her arms and her startled gasp let him just dive right in.One minute.Then he released her and fled into the woods, leaving her alone in the jeep to make her own way back to the house.And then he was gone the next day.Well, it’s no wonder shit like that stuck in her head.

  


“Come back to the car.”

  


“No.”Dean made a sound in the back of his throat.“Did you just _growl_ at me?”Dean sighed and pulled Sam by the arm.“You can’t just drag me around like a—“

  


“I can, and I will.I came 1600 miles to save you from something, and apparently it’s yourself.”He kept pulling.“Don’t make me pick you up.”So Sam shuffled.

  


“I don’t know why I called.You didn’t need to know I have issues.It’s not like you can do anything about my neuroses.”But she linked her arm with Dean’s anyway.It kept him from grabbing on again too.

  


“We all have issues, Sammy.”

  


“Don’t call me that, please.Nobody ever calls me that but you.”

  


“I know.”

  


“Well, stop it.”

  


“You’re awfully pushy for somebody who just unloaded a whole bunch of questionable—hey!You shouldn’t be off having sex with random guys anyway!”

  


“Ok, Mister Double Standard."  


  


“That hurts.”

  


“Truth usually does.”They walked the rest of the way back to the car in silence.Dean sat on the hood.Sam just stood there.“Are we going back?”

  


“You in a hurry?Got a date?” he asked with a smirk.Sam just looked at her shoes.

  


“Not any time soon.”

  


“Well, you do now.Sit.”Sam climbed up on the hood of the Impala and sat next to Dean.The metal was cold and she shivered.Dean put an arm around her shoulders, and drew her close to share warmth from his open coat.Sam sighed and rested her head on Dean’s shoulder.It was sweet.And companionable.And so very conflicting.It was Dean.“I’m not your brother, you know.”

  


“I know.”

  


“Do you?”Sam stiffened and pulled away from Dean.

  


“I know exactly who you are.You’re my _best friend_.You hunt demons for a living.”

  


“So what’s the problem?”Sam could feel the blood draining from her face.She really didn’t want to talk to Dean about—well, anything.She hopped off the car.“Now where are you going?”

  


“This way.”Dean sighed.Fucking girl was going to be the end of him.Sam walked downslope, toward the lake.Dean followed.He had no idea why he was there, other than that was what Sam wanted.

  


“So what’s the real reason I’m here?”

  


“I told you.”

  


“So tell me again.”

  


“No,” said Sam, and Dean rounded on her.He was starting to get angry.He took her by the arm again and started steering her back to the car.

  


“’ _No?’_ You lay this on me and expect me to—what, exactly?”

  


“God, Dean, just let it go.I shouldn’t have said anything.”

  


“What do you want from me?”

  


“I want _you_ , Dean.Why do you have to make me say it?I can’t—“ Sam shook off the hand on her arm.

  


“Why not?”

  


“ _What?_ ”

  


“You heard me.Why not?”Sam was aghast.She just stood there with her mouth hanging open and her eyes as big as saucers.If Dean didn’t know any better, he would have sworn she was afraid.It made something in Dean awake.He took two steps closer to Sam and loomed over her with a smirk.He was sure it was pretty intimidating, or it could have been if not for the look on his face.Dean knew how to take control of a situation.He knew what a shot of adrenaline running through the body could do.It had been a biology class to remember:the three F’s.Flight, fight, or fuck.Dean was nothing if not an adrenaline junky.

  


Dean took another step toward Sam.It brought him very close, and she backed off.But Dean followed.He backed Sam right up into a tree, which she pressed herself against as if she wished to sink into it.It was a classic rookie mistake, and Dean wondered when all her years of training were going to kick in.He leaned in, with his hands pressed to the bark on either side of her head.

  


“What are you afraid of, Sam?”It was almost a whisper.A tone that had never failed to melt knees in the past.She looked at him like she was wishing she had never called, let alone told him anything.Sam had no reason to fear him, for goodness sake; it’s not like he was going to—and he began to wonder.“Did someone hurt you?”

  


Sam visibly relaxed.And almost laughed.She just shook her head instead.Dean’s hands slid down to her shoulders, and he bumped his forehead against hers.Sam pushed off from the tree and slipped her arms around Dean’s waist under his jacket.It was cold, and he was warm and solid and comforting, even if he was a giant ass.Sam burrowed under Dean’s jacket, and he made some small sound.But then he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

  


They just stood there.Dean could hear Sam sigh softly as she pressed her cheek against his chest.He hoped she wasn’t going to cry.He still couldn’t deal with crying women.Dean patted Sam on the back and said, “Let’s go.”She looked up at him strangely.

  


“I don’t want to go back yet.To the dorm.Kris is there, and I…”

  


“That’s fine.Come on, it’s fucking cold out here.”Sam laughed and let Dean drag her up the little hill to the car.

  


“You came to Minnesota wearing only a t-shirt?”

  


“I was in Arizona yesterday, if you recall.It’s hot there.And I have my coat.”

  


“Of course.The coat.Dean Winchester’s famous leather coat of—“

  


“Hey.Don’t mock the coat.It’s served me well enough.And you too.”

  


“Can I have it now?I’m cold.”

  


“Yeah, right, Miss Antifreeze.Get in the car.”

  


“Where are we going?”

  


“I saw a motel a ways back.”Sam froze.She sang herself a litany of _oh God what do I do? I know he doesn’t think anything of it.He’s just tired.And I said I didn’t want to go back_ …The entire way.She stayed in the car while Dean got a room. _Oh God, Dean is getting us a room.Us.He’s getting us a room.It doesn’t mean anything.It doesn’t mean anything.It’s just what Dean does if he doesn’t want to sleep in the car.Oh God no, not the car!_ Sam wound herself up into a tizzy and calmed herself back down a couple times before Dean came back, jingling keys under her nose.If she hadn’t known better, Sam would swear she had just had a heart attack.Or a stroke.Or a complete fucking nervous breakdown.That one was entirely possible.

  


Sam stood by while Dean pulled his stuff from the trunk of the car.She chewed her lip and frowned.She hadn’t been prepared to stay out.No wonder her father had never let her join them on a hunt.Sam didn’t fly by the seat of the pants very well at all.Dean looked up and caught her thinking.

  


“I have toothpaste you can use.”

  


“But I don’t have—“

  


“You have a finger, right?”And he crooked his index finger at her _.True_.

  


Sam followed Dean to the room.She sat on one of the beds and watched him while he unpacked, rearranged, did this and that.He essentially ignored her, so Sam relaxed.

  


“You have a strange amount of rituals for a guy.”

  


“Well, none of them include exfoliating or shaving my legs.Can’t be too bad.”Sam laughed.

  


“Do you mind if I do?” she asked.

  


“Do what?”

  


“Exfoliate and shave my legs.”Dean snorted.

  


“Knock yourself out, sweetheart.You can do whatever you want.”

  


“Can I borrow your razor?” Sam laughed.Dean turned to her, horrified.

  


“Oh, no.None of that.You can use this.”He tossed her a sheathed hunting knife that was easily eight inches long.Sam pulled off the sheath and looked the knife over.She turned it over a few times, nodded in appreciation, and slid it under the pillow.Dean smiled.“Change your mind?”

  


“No.I’ll just wait until you fall asleep,” said Sam with a wink.Dean looked offended.

  


“I can go all night long.”Sam opened her mouth to respond, then thought better of it.Dean smirked at her and put a knife under the pillows on the other bed.Then he took off his coat and his boots and socks and flopped down on it.He snagged the remote, and with a glance at Sam started channel surfing.“It’s still early.”

  


Sam watched Dean channel surf.It was pretty funny.She could tell when he came across something interesting because he wiggled his feet and squirmed like an excited puppy.“Still don’t get cable at home?”Dean shot her a look.Sam grinned and curled up on her bed.She could feel the knife under the pillow, next to her shoulder.She shifted a little so she could reach under and touch it.It was warm.She ran her fingers over the hilt.It was smooth and hard.Dean’s.Sam whipped her hand out from under the pillow.Dean didn’t seem to notice.

  


“Did you cut yourself?”Apparently he had noticed.Sam raised her hand and waggled her fingers at him.Then she thrust it under her side and curled up again. _Shameful.Lusting after your best friend like that._

  


After a few more circuits of the channels, Dean gave up and tossed the remote at Sam.She let it lie.Dean got up and went into the bathroom.Sam sat up and shook her head and moved the remote to the nightstand.She could hear the water running, and Dean brushing his teeth.Sam stood up and walked around the room once, then sat down again and took off her boots, then stuffed in her socks.She wondered what else she could do to settle in for the night, so she took off her sweatshirt.The big brown and yellow ‘M’ looked at her from the chair.She had on a t-shirt too, of course, but there was security in layers.

  


“Nice t-shirt.”Sam blushed.She hadn’t done it on purpose, really, but she wore the tatty Nirvana shirt Dean had gotten for her years ago. _At least you don’t like whiny chick rock_ , he had said.

  


Sam moved to go into the bathroom.Dean had been quick; she was still half wondering what to do with herself.But Dean blocked her path.He stood in the doorway, leaning against the jamb, holding the toothpaste.His hair was damp and stood up in spikes, and his face was pink from a quick scrub.His t-shirt was slung over his shoulder.Sam stopped in her tracks. _I can’t do this.I have to get out of here_.Dean must have seen the look in her eyes because he tossed the toothpaste and his shirt and closed the distance between them in two steps.


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	5.   Hit or Miss, Section 5/5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   _Disclaimers, etc._   Dean and Sam are not related.  And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)

Title:Hit or Miss, Section 5/5

Universe:Supernatural

Genre:het

Rating:This section is a good, solid R.  Not quite as NC-17 as the previous one.

Notes: _Disclaimers, etc._ Dean and Sam are not related.And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)

.5.

Dean was twenty-eight when John died.They had found the thing that had killed Mary and baby Sam—actually, it had found them.It was horrible, and it tortured them, and it used them against each other.In a last twisted ploy to get John and Dean to wipe out the remainder of the Winchester family—each other—it took over John’s body.But John, being John, fought it, and won enough time to destroy the thing.And himself.But not Dean.Dean was safe.

 

Dean wandered.John’s death hit him hard.Of course it would.He had watched it happen.Hell, he had practically participated.There had been nothing he could do.And now he was alone, truly, for the first time ever.He was sure he would simply continue on with the hunting, but for now, he just couldn’t bring himself to do it.To do anything, for that matter.So he drove.

 

Dean woke up one day and found himself a mile from Sam’s.She lived in Minnesota still, not far from Jim’s, actually, and she was a medical examiner or something.That always freaked Dean out a bit.He couldn’t imagine Sam in a morgue all day.Or working so closely with cops.

 

Sam was home.When she opened her door to Dean, she was struck by how terrible he looked.He was thin, and looked tired, and oh so sad.She pulled him inside and closed the door.Sam turned and hugged Dean fiercely, blinking back tears.Her dad had told her about John.

 

Sam led Dean into her house.It was strange to see him again after so long.They hadn’t stayed in contact, but each of them still knew everything about the other.Jim was a terrible gossip.Dean was strangely silent.Sam wished that she had called, a thousand times over the years, because now here was her Dean, and she didn’t know him.

 

Sam sat Dean down on her sofa.He let her, and sat there staring at his hands on his knees.Sam sat next to him.He hadn’t said a word.She wouldn’t push.Sam reached for Dean’s hand and squeezed it.He let out a gasping sigh and threw her off, only to crumble against her when she touched his shoulder.Sam wrapped her arms around him and stroked his hair as he pressed his head to her chest.Dean was silent, but she knew he wept, for his shuddering and the wetness seeping through her shirt.

 

Dean was still for a long time.Sam thought he had fallen asleep when she went to gently move him so she could get up, but his arms tightened around her.Sam smiled sadly into Dean’s hair.

 

“Come on.You need some sleep.Are you hungry?Want a drink?”Dean sat up and looked at her.

 

“No.I’m fine, thank you.”He shook his head and looked away.His eyes were red.Sam grasped Dean’s hand again, and when he let her hold it, she stood.

 

“Let’s get you to bed then.”Sam tugged Dean to his feet.“You’ll have to stay in my room.The guest room is… kind of a mess.”

 

“I can live with messy, Sam.”

 

“You can’t see the bed.”Dean sighed at that.

 

“I don’t want to put you out—“

 

“You’re not.”

 

“I didn’t come to sleep with you either.”

 

“I know.Just shut up and come on.”Sam dragged Dean to the bedroom.He stopped at the door.

 

“Won’t your husband be upset?” Dean asked.Sam fixed him with a look.

 

“You know I’m not married.”

 

“Your boyfriend, then?”Sam actually rolled her eyes.

 

“You know I don’t have a boyfriend, either.Quit stalling.”

 

“Look, Sam, I shouldn’t—“

 

“And where would you go?To a motel?To my dad’s?At least I won’t make you go to church on Sunday.And I might make you breakfast.”

 

“If I had known that I would have come a long time ago.”Dean slammed his mouth shut.Sam dropped his hand and went into the room.Dean followed her.“I’m sorry, Sam.It’s been too long.”She turned at looked at him.

 

“You don’t need to apologize for anything.” Sam sat on the end of the bed, clean sheets in her hands.“I should.I pulled you in and then pushed you away with both hands.No wonder you’re mad at me.”

 

“I’m not mad at you,” Dean said softly.Sam quirked an eyebrow at him.“Not any more, anyway.”Sam snorted.“Think I’d be here now if I was?”

 

Sam looked away from Dean and stood up.She thrust the clean sheets into his hands and turned to strip the bed.She flung blankets onto the floor and tugged at the linens.Dean helped her smooth the clean ones in place.

 

“I can’t even remember the last time I did that,” he said.Dean and Sam both sat on the end of the newly-made bed.The blankets still lay on the floor.“Why do you have blankets?It’s July.”

 

“It’s Minnesota,” Sam shrugged.“And I’m always cold.”Dean’s hand crept slowly to the small of Sam’s back and pressed gently.Sam straightened and with a sigh, twined her arms around Dean’s neck and buried her head in his shoulder.

 

“I’ll keep you warm, Sammy,” Dean mumbled into her hair.Sam snorted.

 

“That line usually work for you?”Dean just shrugged.“I thought you didn’t come here to sleep with me?”

 

“Um, bonus?”And Sam bit him through all his layers of shirts and laughed.

 

Sam stood and pushed Dean back onto the bed.He lay there a moment, resting on his elbows and looking at her, until Sam put a knee up on the bed and climbed onto him.She straddled his hips and took his face in her hands and kissed him hard.Dean surged up to meet her and she used his own momentum to rip his outer shirt open.Buttons flew everywhere, and Dean just looked at Sam for a second before he flipped her over onto the bed and half stood to take his ruined shirt the rest of the way off, along with the one underneath it.

 

Sam hissed when she saw Dean’s bare chest.There were so many scars, new and old, that she hadn’t seen or heard about.In the past, he called her whenever he got hurt, even if it was just a scratch.To whine, to hear her laugh at him if it was his pretty face, to get some sympathy.Now…He hadn’t called in years.But he was here now, brokenhearted from the loss of his father.It was like the first time they met, when they were four, and Dean was silent and shocked by the other deaths in his family.His mother.His infant brother.

 

Sam reached for him then, pulled him by his belt loops.Dean fell upon her, harsh kisses, and scrabbling fingers tugging at her clothes.She cried out when he entered her, and he paused, but she thrust up against him fiercely, encouraging.Dean was rough, and bit and nipped and scraped her with a stubbly jaw as often as he licked and kissed and sucked.His mouth was active, but he didn’t say a word.He rode her hard, and Sam matched him, pace for pace.She raked her nails down his back and arms and chest, anywhere she could reach, and dug her heel into his back, and bit and nipped him in turn.Dean forced a stream of incoherent sounds from her mouth, hot against his neck and into his ear.He was hard and unrelenting and didn’t slow down at all when she started to tense and shake because he was hitting the perfect spot, and she said his name over and over again until she was screaming and could barely hear him shout hers over the rush of blood in her ears and the beating of her heart.

 

Dean lay with his head on Sam’s chest.He could see bruises rising to the surface of her skin, some with clear teeth marks, and he felt a sudden rush of guilt for hurting her.He stirred, and she quieted him with a gentle hand in his hair.He didn’t intend to move.If he moved, he would slip out of her body, and he didn’t want to, not yet.Dean realized with a start that they hadn’t used a condom.It was a first for him; he was always, always, _always_ so careful…Sam petted him, and her fingers trailed along the welts she had made along his back.It had been fair play; they were both marked.

 

Dean rolled off Sam after a few minutes.She immediately fit herself under his arm.They dozed.Sam was warm, but Dean was warmer, and she snuggled into his heat.Dean woke to find Sam’s eyes on him.

 

“Are you ok?” she asked softly.Dean considered for a moment before he answered.

 

“I will be.”He felt Sam relax in his arms.“It’s always been so different with you…”Sam frowned, confused.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“It’s like… Coming home.”Sam blushed and looked away, studying the pattern on the sheet.

 

“You could be,” she mumbled.

 

“What?”

 

“You could stay.”Dean was silent.And Sam was frozen, waiting for him to say something.

 

“Maybe.”He paused.“Let’s see if we don’t kill each other for a couple days.”

 

“You’re going to stay for a couple days?” Sam smiled.

 

“At least.If you’ll let me,” he grinned, a flash of the old Dean.Happier.“Let’s see how it goes.”Dean’s hands started to wander.He rolled onto his side so he could reach Sam better.His hand slipped down her side and slid around her waist to pull her closer.Sam laughed.Dean nuzzled her neck and breathed deep, taking in her scent.Familiar.“It’s been so long, Sam,” he said, a bare whisper.“I’ve missed you.”

 

Sam sighed and wrapped her arms around Dean’s neck.“So many years,” she said into his hair.“I’ve missed you too.  
  
[Epilogue  
](http://caras-fic.livejournal.com/5448.html#cutid1)


	6.   Hit or Miss, Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   _Disclaimers, etc._   Dean and Sam are not related.  And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)

Title:Hit or Miss, Epilogue

Universe:Supernatural

Genre:het

Rating:This is just PG-13, if that.  Well, there may be a bad word or two.

Notes: _Disclaimers, etc._ Dean and Sam are not related.And Sam is a girl (oh so sorry, she was very persistent.)  
  
 **Notes 2:  Warning!  This is what happens when I am out of town for several days and start to miss my charming husband and sweet girlie.  I resisted, but this part kind of ate my brain and wouldn't quit until I wrote it down.  I feel better now...  But!  This be schmoop.  Seriously.  The saccharin levels of schmoop in this piece are so high as to be carcinogenic.  Don't say I didn't warn you.**  
  


.Epilogue.

Sam took a week off from work.She was due vacation anyway, she said.She stayed home and fed Dean food and sex until he was pink and healthy and smiling again.His haunted look was gone.

 

They still knew each other so well, and yet surprised each other too.Dean could cook.Nothing fancy, but he could hold his own.Sam didn’t bother.It was a habit from medical school when she didn’t have time to either eat or sleep.Dean, always a loner, and a dog to boot, took to staying in Sam’s house and in Sam’s bed like he had always been there.Sam alternated between panic and satisfaction.

 

Jim must have known that Dean was at Sam’s.He didn’t come over or even call for days.When he did show up, his knowing look that was almost—but not quite—a leer actually made Dean squirm.But then Sam slapped his arm and cried a horrified “Dad!” and he laughed and shook Dean’s hand.

 

“So I’ve been thinking,” said Jim, after all the niceties had been made, and sympathy extended.

 

“About what, Dad?” asked Sam with a note of suspicion.

 

“Dean.”And Dean visibly paled.Was he about to get his ass kicked by an elderly priest?Well, Jim wasn’t exactly elderly, and he wasn’t a priest either, technically, but the details didn’t matter is his ass was on the line.But then Jim grinned.“Don’t worry, boy, I’m not going to beat you for stealing my daughter’s virtue.”Sam made some offended noise and Jim patted her hand absently.“Have you given any thought about what you are going to do with yourself now that the quest is over?”Jim paused to allow for a response, but when Dean did nothing other than open and close his mouth, he continued.“Why don’t you keep it up?”

 

“What?” squawked Sam.“Why would you encourage—“

 

“Hush, girl, I’m not finished.”Jim shot Sam a piercing look and she sat down with her hands in her lap like she was in church.“Now, you, Dean, you’re a name out there in the network.”Dean looked skeptical.“No, really.You have contacts in the fifty states and half of Canada who wouldn’t hesitate to call you in for anything from a poltergeist to a pooka.”

 

“Dude, I hate pookas,” Dean remarked.

 

“And that’s exactly my point.You have a long and varied experience working with the supernatural.You should make use of it.”

 

“But Dad!Why would—“Sam interrupted.

 

“Samantha, please.I’m trying to make a point.”

 

“Which is?” growled Dean, irritated and confused and more irritated because of it.

 

“Go pro.”

 

“I _am_ a professional,” Dean pointed out.

 

“Not in the eyes of the law.Get your investigator’s license.Find missing persons.Snoop on cheating spouses.But also do the dirty work; the ghosts, the demons.But only when you’re called in.With your reputation and your connections, I bet you’d be busier with that than with the mundane stuff.But you’d also get paid to do it.”Sam squirmed in her seat and bit her lip to keep from interrupting again.“And before my daughter chews her own face off,” Jim teased, “You could stay here.With us.”Sam’s mouth dropped open.

 

“That’s awfully presumptuous of you,” she said.“Dean was leaving.”

 

“That boy’s not going anywhere,” Jim stated matter-of-factly.Dean’s eyebrows shot up, and Sam scowled.“You’re not wearing shoes.”Dean looked at his feet. _True_ , he was barefoot.“I’ve never, in all the years I’ve known you, seen you without boots on.I don’t even see them in this room.And the back seat of the Impala is empty.All your things are in here, aren’t they?Yet you’re only wearing a t-shirt.One layer.”

 

“It’s July.”

 

“It’s Minnesota,” Jim retorted.“And for a Winchester, layers are as good as armor.Let’s see,” Jim counted on his fingers.“Not packed and ready to go, not dressed and ready to go, not dressed and ready to fight.You’re not even armed.You’re not going anywhere.”Jim looked sharply at Dean and leaned in to emphasize his point.“You’re home.”

 

Dean and Sam both sat silently, looking at Jim.Jim cleared his throat, kissed Sam on the cheek, thumped Dean on the back, and left the house.

 

“Well, that was awkward,” said Dean softly.Sam jumped up off the couch and started to pace.

 

“I can’t believe him!How could he—what did he—we haven’t even—I don’t know—“

 

“You plan on finishing any of those thoughts?” Dean laughed.Sam threw up her hands and screamed in frustration.She stomped into her room and flopped down on the bed.Dean grinned and followed her.He sat on the bed beside Sam’s prostrate form.He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and could see her smile as he did it.“He had a point, you know.Do you want me to leave?”Sam buried her nose in the crumpled sheets and spoke into the mattress.

 

“No.”

 

“What was that?I didn’t quite catch it,” Dean teased.Sam’s fist shot out and clipped him in the belly.Dean grunted and Sam pulled him down.

 

“I said ‘no’, you bastard.I don’t want you to leave me.I mean, leave…”Sam’s fists twisted in Dean’s t-shirt.

 

“I won’t leave you.Not unless you want me to.”

 

“I don’t want you to.”

 

“So you said,” Dean smirked.Sam pinched him.“You’re so mean to me.Maybe I should just go…”

 

“I thought you liked it rough,” Sam laughed.

 

“Maybe I do.”Dean’s eyes glittered wickedly as he leaned down and bit Sam’s neck.She thrashed and kicked and they giggled themselves into silence.“So where can I find a decent apartment?”

 

“Stay here.”

 

“What?”

 

“You heard me,” she said.

 

So Dean stayed.

 

After a week he had his papers together for a private investigator’s license.After a month he had notice on when to expect it.After another month, he had it.The spare bedroom turned into an office.But it didn’t matter, the house was for sale anyway.Sam wanted them to live somewhere that had only been the both of them.

 

Dean found house hunting stupefyingly dull.He itched to kill something, and found himself hoping that the realtor was secretly a demon.Luckily, he was called to Omaha by one of Caleb’s contacts to dispatch a ghost in a grain elevator.The ghosts in Nebraska had to haunt something, he guessed.Sam had a house waiting for his approval by the time he got back.

 

Sam’s assistant got married in the spring.She was 25.Sam moped for weeks until Dean figured it out.Sam was 29.Almost 30.Apparently in girl years that was old.Dean talked to Jim about it.They had no idea what to do.Sure, Sam had Barbies when she was a kid, but Barbie never married Ken.Ken usually ended up buried in the mud up to his neck while Barbie danced around him in a circle, waiting for the dog to eat his head (usually filled with peanut butter.)

 

Jim married them in the summer.In the church.If there were only a dozen or so people there, no one cared to comment.Dean was still kind of scratching his head as to how he got there. _Dude, I’m getting married?In a church?What the fuck?_ Sam found it endlessly entertaining.

 

Dean’s son was born the following spring.John James Winchester.But they called him Jay.Jessica Mary, his sister, joined them a year later.Sam called a moratorium on babies.They were out of names, after all.


End file.
